Postcards from Billy

For the newly initiated, POSTCARDS is recurring feature with fashion advice from my dear friend Billy, an art consultant with a wicked eye and even wickeder wardrobe. In this edition, he reflects on this past round of September issues of fashion mags. (Btw, has anyone seen The September Issue, The Movie? My friend Dana and I have a date to see this coming weekend.) And without further ado, a postcard from an unlikely location…

Postcard from the Bathroom (TMI)

I am a far cry from Carrie Bradshaw, who would appropriately set aside a few hours and perhaps snuggle up with a latte to tear through the much awaited September issues of the fashion rags. Instead, I prefer to save these for either a long plane ride or a trip to the bathroom (I know, definitely TMI). It’s often difficult to plan a trip around the delivery of the biggest issues of the year of Vogue, Harper’s Bazaar and W, so I guess I must reconcile myself to the latter option this year. I know I could probably just surf the internet for a taste of the upcoming collections, but I am old school and would rather wait, like an anxious child before Christmas morning, for the delivery of the telephone book size editions of the fashion world tomes.

So, without further ado let me first address the ads. We all know that the bulk of the fall issues is 80% paid promotions for the fashion houses and cosmetic giants.

· Love, love, love the Dolce & Gabbana images of somewhat feral models in brilliant beast fur coats. Did they get some sort of kick-back from Spike Jonze to help promote his upcoming flick, Where the Wild Things Are?

Dolce & Gabbana Winter 2010

 

· To paraphrase Michael Kors from a recent Project Runway – “maybe it’s so forward thinking that we don’t get it” – Prada’s new campaign is either really avant garde or AWFUL. At this point, I am going with the latter. The girls are most likely the standard size 0 models, but somehow they look like they are plus-size and wearing the new offerings from Casual Corner. I will say that the rubber wading boots with garters seem like a chic homage to fly fishing, but that’s the only good thing I can say about these ads.

· I’ve always felt that Nordstroms were nothing but elaborate money laundering fronts since I never seem to find anything worthy of my credit cards, but I have discovered a brilliant new designer in their latest spread – Haider Ackermann. The gorgeous blood-red fish tail skirt with matching zippered coat is breathtaking.

Okay, so I get it … they want to be timely and he was the King of Pop, but all the editorials that paid tribute to Michael Jackson were not very inspired – hello Harper’s Bazaar. It was probably too late to meet deadlines, but I would have much rather seen fashion shoots with references to all of the brilliant films of my youth by John Hughes. His passing has definitely made me more melancholy. So, how about models styled in homage to:

· Claire Standish – the most stylish Molly Ringwald character from The Breakfast Club. Although some will argue that her naïve ingénue in Sixteen Candles was more fashion forward for the time. I still salivate when I see her in the coraly pink top paired with the paisley wrap-around skirt and perfectly tied together with brown belt and chic lace-up knee high boots. She was the perfect package down to her bento box of sushi, her daddy’s BMW and her poor, rich drunk mother in the Caribbean (to steal a line from Judd Nelson’s character, John Bender).

· Jules – Demi Moore at her Republican party girl preppy best in St. Elmo’s Fire.
· Sloane Peterson – some will say that Ferris himself was the fashion icon of the movie bearing his name, but I was so enamored with his girlfriend played by the gorgeous Mia Sara.

So, head to the newsstand and pick up all of the September issues and let me set the soundtrack for the next few hours you’ll need to peruse these massive editions. Its only right that the Ipod is geared up for a tribute to Hughes films, so plan on some Orchestral Maneuvers in the Dark, Flesh For Lulu, The Rave Ups, Psychedelic Furs and of course, Eighties by Killing Joke.

Dr. Skud Fly-Swatter: 12, Plantation Molasses: 0

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Our house has been overrun by attack crickets, and they are at super high decibel in Tiny G’s room. At first I thought it was sweet—Tiny G could be lulled to sleep by the symphony of these chirping little devils and pretend that he grew up in the country instead of smack dab in the middle of urban L.A. It has heretofore been such a lovely sound – in fact the personalized ring for my husband on my iPhone is chirping crickets! But then I read that crickets like Prada, and suddenly the crickets didn’t sound all that cute anymore.

Chemical sprays were out of the question with Tiny G underfoot, so we tried making our own cricket traps with Plantation Blackstrap Molasses. Even though it’s organic, I figured the name sounded like it meant business. Unfortunately, of the six baby-food jars full of molasses we strategically placed around the house to catch these little bastards, not a single cricket took the bait. So we resorted to a Philippe Starck “Dr. Skud” fly-swatter. And by “we,” I mean my husband, who took out TWELVE of these critters last night alone. It sounds like there are still at least a hundred left, taunting, chirping, and casing the Prada. Dr. Skud can only handle so much. Does anyone have another nontoxic suggestion for extermination?

POSTCARD: Going Somewhere?

Back by ever-popular demand is the latest “POSTCARDS FROM BILLY.” For the newly initiated—fashion advice from my dear friend Billy, an art consultant with a wicked eye and even wickeder wardrobe. In this edition, he packs our weekend bags for ModCom week in Palm Springs, Feb 13 – 21, the annual Modernism Week with collaboration between the Modernism Show, Palm Springs Preservation Foundation, Palm Springs Historical Society, Palm Springs Modern Committee and the Palm Springs Art Museum.

 

 

 

POSTCARD FROM YOUR NEAREST LANDING STRIP…

I don’t know about you, but I always find my mind wandering from the latest copy of US Weekly on a plane thinking “did I pack enough?” Good Lord, as much as I should concentrate on the insight provided by Stars, Just Like Us, I worry if I have the right pieces from the arsenal ready for the trip ahead. More times than not, my pragmatic ESPN-minded boyfriend has reassured me that I have more than enough in my steamer-like suitcase. However he fails to realize that life can throw you a curve ball (I love sports references) and you might need to have an appropriate cocktail outfit ready for that weekend at the lake house in Vermont. 

So, I always have a glass of wine (well, my own low-rent version of a spritzer, Diet Sprite—or Fresca if it’s available—and white wine) and some tunes when I write my Postcards to The Foodinista. Right now L.L. Cool J’s “Around the Way Girl” is playing, and I’m dreaming of a girl with bamboo earrings, at least two pair and a Fendi bag with a bad attitude. If life were that simple you would have your uniform and be built for travel. However, for those girls in my life that can’t play a bit part in an L.L. video, these are my current suggestions for packing for a three-day jaunt. So, if I must fantasize about the destination – you are on your way for a few days in sunny Palm Springs, spending most of your time by the pool with two confidantes.

FOR BILLY’S MUST-PACKS, CLICK READ MORE BELOW…

California dreaming on a winter’s day

In reality, it really doesn’t get all that cold in Los Angeles. (We’re currently in the “dead of winter” and it’s 67 degrees out today. Sorry, Lizzie.) Which means we get cheated out of one of life’s great pleasures—the serious winter wardrobe, Burberry Prorsum wool trench coats, Prada metallic leather gloves, Wolford merino wool tights, etc. Looking on the bright side, we can “bundle up” with pretty silk woven scarves, which won’t get you very far in Buffalo in January let me tell you, but are just fine cruising down the Miracle Mile. Above are my two favorites, both Missoni. The striped scarf in rich tones of jade, amethyst, coral and silvery blue was my mom’s, circa ’79 (she now claims I stole it, but in fact I traded her a pair of Louboutins for it; they were sky blue strappy sandals if anyone’s wondering), while the cheerier zigzag scarf in tangerine, candy pink, yellow and white was purchased in Lake Como on our honeymoon, pre-economic meltdown. Both look great with neutrals and jeans, and will bring a hit of color and a bit of warmth to a cold, drab (L.A.) winter’s day. For current Missoni stripe and zigzag scarves, check out the offerings at Net-a-Porter.

Postcards…

What can I say? Life is better with a friend like Billy in your life. Billy and I met on a fashion shoot eight years ago when he was heading up the Muse program at LACMA. He’s an art consultant with a wicked eye and an even wickeder wardrobe. (Think tailored boys blazers, monograms, cashmere, and lots of it.) Every so often he sends me what we call “postcards,” emails loaded with completely over-the-top yet somehow sensible advice on what to wear, where to buy, and why. Here’s his latest on recession shopping. Settle in with a cuppa or cocktail, and enjoy.

POSTCARD FROM SARAJEVO…

My version of long-term investments has always been a well-stocked freezer. I’m not in the slightest bit knowledgeable about portfolios or solid stocks. However, I did hear Warren Buffett say recently on NPR that when times were tough he invested since bargains were to be found and always came back around. At this year’s Art Basel Miami Beach many savvy collectors were offering similar advice – great art will hold its value and galleries and dealers were making cut-rate deals left and right. It’s the same with fashion, so spend some now and freeze your credit cards again when the sales end in February.

So, before you plunder the fashion equivalent of Eastern Europe circa 1994 – Barneys, Bergdorfs and Saks – this is my advice.

TO CONTINUE READING BILLY’S LATEST, CLICK READ BELOW…

Days of “Ore”

Nothing screams festive like a good metallic shoe. (Except for maybe a Christmas sweater.) Several pairs of metallic beauties are tucked away in my closet, including a favorite pair of silver tinsel Louboutin 4-inch stilettos, bronze patent-leather Prada d’orsays, a pair of silver glittery Miu Miu flats and some red metallic slingbacks by an obscure Spanish designer—none of which I can wear post-baby. Ach! This season, however, the “it” metallic hue looks to be “ore” as evidenced by my stylist friend Vincent’s Pierre Hardy ankle boots from Barneys and my sister’s Manolo Blahnik Carolynes picked up next door at Neiman’s that sauntered into a holiday party last weekend.